When we name our pain, we are restoring honor and dignity.

It wasn’t until year six in our recovery that I got to a point where I realized the risk of change was less than the risk of staying the same. I had a sweet baby boy, God’s gift to us and yet my heart was cold. I knew I didn’t want this to be my family’s legacy. So one night, lying in bed, I decided to choose to trust God again. To give Him my life.

I remember finally getting to the point where I allowed myself to grieve-I would wail for hours in my closet and the sounds coming from deep inside actually frightened me. I realized at this moment that because I hadn’t allowed myself to fully grieve anything since childhood, it was years of pain and heartache all coming out like floodwaters through a broken dam.

It was through the wait that God started a good work in me, cultivating character and strength, hope and love; and born out of the suffering - immense joy.

Sadly, those cards don't exist. Note to self: you should seriously write down all the sentiments you feel and start making your own cards for women with a similar story. I bet they'd be popular.

I identify that the one experience, more than any other, that started to refine this character trait, was coming to terms with the fact that Jason was unfaithful to me.

We don't have to forgive perfectly, grieve perfectly, or go through this process perfectly.

For myself, the first step to taking back my intuition was demanding to know the truth about my life.

Little did I know that this was the beginning of an invisible me. There was a high cost that I would pay for standing in the shadows.

Just to be clear, a boundary won't 100% of the time prevent our husband from acting out. Rather, it is something put into place for our safety and protection.

One of the first steps in my road to healing was finding my voice and finding my feelings. It's only after we accomplish this that setting boundaries can even be a tool that helps us communicate our needs to our husband.

How do we invite others into our process all the while protecting ourselves and not damaging our husband's reputation?

It’s the best thing that ever happened...