So often we give others power in our lives that only belong to us.

More than anything - I want each of you to know that you are not alone and there are women across the world in similar situations to yours. Trying to figure out how to celebrate Christmas with grace and ease.

For women walking through betrayal - this is especially hard because betrayal is pretty much just like a mid-life crisis and what we thought we liked or were passionate about - all of a sudden goes out the window.

If you have no idea what you are looking at, let me tell you - you are looking at my 4 week NEW laptop in a Pyrex dish of rice. (Don't mind me, I'm just going to rock back and forth in the fetal position a little while longer.)

Honestly, I consider this to be essential when it comes to self-care which is something I harp on a LOT in my groups.

Why do we keep landing here? Asking ourselves - what are we really doing? Why are we limping along like this? Should it really be this difficult? This stressful?

And little did I know, those first few years after betrayal served as training ground to develop coping strategies that I could continue to use as the years ticked by.

Because coming up for a breath of air ever so often is a really good thing. In fact, I think it's really good self-care to take such breaks.

It seems I've had just enough time to tackle the must-do's on my to-do's and I'm not building in any margin for the things on my list that feed my soul.

I'm sure it would be lovely about now to insert a Bible verse given I'm a Christian and all - but the first thing that came to mind was Kelly Clarkson's "Stronger".

And if we don't have some strategies in place to help us get through the hour, the day, the week... well, we're going to sink.

Because self-care is such an important part of this process (and to be exact, it's an important part of living life well), I believe that we can all hone in on our self-care skills through the winter.

And I'm beginning to think that one of the ways I can make friends with winter is to embrace its meaning. And for me, I'm beginning to think that winter = loving myself well. Taking a break, slowing down, and being good to my soul.

It forced me to look for the things that truly make my heart skip a beat.