Review and an update {An update on Insecurity - A 2015 Intentional (#3)}

Back at the beginning of the year, I shared with you my 2015 Intentionals.  The things I wanted to keep close to my heart this year and work through one bite at a time.  I specifically focused on working through my insecurities here on the blog.  You can find a couple of updates both here and here.In this post, I'd like to review some of my big breakthroughs as well as a little update for you on where I'm at with this whole insecurity thing.Breakthrough #1 - Naming it and Claiming it - In the past, when I've felt any prickly feelings, my first line of defense is to do what I can to get rid of the feelings.  That is quickly followed by being hard on myself (via self-talk) for ever even feeling those feelings in the first place.  Ladies, I'm here to tell you:  It didn't work.  So what I'm now trying to do is allow the feelings to sit.  I'm trying to ask myself:  "Why do I feel this way?"  "What is going on internally that has me feeling these so-hard-to-swallow feelings?"Breakthrough #2 - No Overnight Cures - This one dovetails nicely with #1.  Once I've acknowledged that the feelings I'm sitting with stem from insecurity, why the rush to fix it?  Rather, allowing myself to say, "So I'm feeling insecure."  Followed by, "Okay." And a deep breath (versus okay and a now what do I do?!).Breakthrough #3 - The RX for Insecurity isn't Change - At some point, I think I thought I needed to change myself in order to not be insecure.  This could look like changes on the inside (which, let's be honest, are the more difficult things to change and certainly not a bad idea all together) or changes on the outside.  What if instead, working through insecurity starts and ends with embracing, celebrating and loving who I am (and who you are, too!)!Breakthrough #4 - Resting in God's Goodness and His Divine Sovereignty Over My Little Life - Once again, this dovetails nicely with #3.  When I quiet my soul.  And recognize that God made me uniquely.  Unlike anyone else on this earth.  When I recognize that He has a plan for my life.  That I'm not a mistake.  That's when it seems that I start to really feel the ground again.  I feel centered.  Whole.

So where does that leave me today?

Well, here is the update:  I am totally secure today!  I've simply worked through these four breakthroughs and wha-lah, I'm cured!

Kidding.

Ladies, I feel like God is continuing to refine me in this area.  It doesn't take much for me to start to spin out and feel insecure.Can I be honest with you?  Something about being in ministry and desiring to help other women seems to really have increased it up a notch or two.  Can anyone relate to this?  I didn't feel this insecure in my previous career.  I don't remember comparing myself (the thief of all joy!) to others quite so much.  Maybe this is just a part of the package?  And I don't like it.  Yet, I also recognize that God is using these circumstances I keep finding myself in every couple of weeks to allow me to grow.

As someone very witty once told me, "Well, Shelley, it sounds like you signed up for a personal development course and you didn't even know you registered for it!"

Awesome.  Thanks.It might be the same for you.  Chances are, if you are reading this blog post, you have been hurt by your husband or boyfriend.  You have been betrayed.  And this brings a whole slew of insecurities to work through.  I know because I've been there.No matter where these insecurities stem from - your man's betrayal, your line of work, the role you play in your family - I want you to know that there is hope for you in this area.  For each of these insecurity sources - it all goes back to the same thing:  Quieting your soul, naming it and allowing yourself to sit in it.  Recognizing that God has a plan for your life.  And recognizing that you don't need to be anyone else to be loved, accepted, enough.I want to key in on one more thing here:  Recognizing that this planet needs originals!  Please, ladies, don't try to be who your husband lusted after.  No way.  Don't try to be the person your friend is.  No way.  Be yourself.  Embrace the way God made You.  I've kept this close to my heart lately (so we'll call it breakthrough #5) - How can I be true to me?  How can I embrace myself?  Even the parts of myself that might not be seen in this world or in my community as acceptable but are actually very acceptable and allow me to embrace who I am?As you can see ladies, I'm still working through this.  The quest continues.What has your insecurity journey looked like?  Would you put on your brave pants (or your comfy pants) and share more of it here?