on being different
I just spent part of my morning writing a blog post for MOPs on the topic of being different. I will link to it here when it comes out in November.It has me really thinking about how much I don't like to be different. So much so, that I've found myself being quite duplicitous lately. This duplicitous-ness doesn't feel so great. And I think it's because I so badly want to fit in, to be the same, to be accepted, chosen, loved. (Y'all hear?!)
For instance - big confession here - I was with a group of six or seven girls recently from the 'hood that I met when Tru was in kinder (he is now in 3rd grade). There is one other gal that shares a similar faith to mine, but otherwise - not the case. So we were engaging in a conversation and I was sharing about the camp I grew up going to. I remember mentioning the word legalism and seeing that my friends might not have understood what I was saying. I then said, and I kid you not, "I mean, I'm a (long pause in my head - do I say Christian or is that too much? Definitely too much. Religious? - I don't really like that word. Spiritual? - I guess that gets the point across without me looking too different) I'm ah, a... I'm spiritual."The conversation moved on but I did not. Really? Did I just say I was spiritual because I didn't want to be looked at as so different? Is this what it's come to?
Girls, this was a huge awakening for me. It opened my eyes to the fact that I oftentimes change little parts of me to make sure I fit in with whomever is in front of me.
This is SO NOT how I want to live!Fast forward to this past week and I'm starting to see how much we, as a family, are swimming upstream in our community primarily regarding decisions we have made and and are making to help protect our children from getting caught up in pornography.We are different and it's not the cool kind of different. For instance, we don't let our boys play video games - there are multiple reasons for this which I'm not going to dive into right now but happy to do so at a later date. Tru was with one of his friends and his friend was enthusiastically talking about Minecraft. (Girls, I had to google the word because I've never been sure - is it Mindcraft or Minecraft?) Truman just listened away and tried to join in on the conversation as best as he could. My momma heart ached inside. Because I realized that the choices we are making are going to start having a real impact on him.How can I encourage him to embrace being different? And how can I encourage him to do that if I can't do it myself??? Oh my!So here I am. Limping along. Trying to figure out who I am and why I can't embrace the fact that I AM different, starting with my different-kind-of-story. I'm also trying to figure out why "different" has always felt scary to me instead of something to embrace, ponder, and explore.
Because there is this little part of me that knows being different brings texture and color to life. Being different can open my heart and my mind to others differences. Being different allows me to ask questions and understand others points of views.
The world would be so small, so boring if we were all the same.Being different = unique. I like unique. In fact, I'm always more interested in those that are unique.Girls, God made each of us uniquely. What would it look like if each of us embraced our uniqueness, our differences instead of hiding our differences in the dark in the hopes nobody will find us out? What would it look like if we started to celebrate each others' uniqueness? What it we noticed and asked questions and opened our hearts and our minds wide?As you go about your weekend - I want you to think about what makes you unique. I dare you to be brave, really brave, and show others who you really are.