Tiffany’s Story

Friday, February 8th, 2019

Hello Ladies!

I want to make sure each of you is aware of the Restore Workshop coming to Irvine, CA; March 1-3, 2019. I would love for you to join me for a weekend of laughing, crying and digging deep. No doubt you will leave feeling restored and with a plan for wholeness and healing.

Below is a letter I received from a woman that attended Restore in 2017 (names have been changed for privacy). I hope it encourages you as you consider your next steps.

Hi Shelley,
I hope all is well!  I attended the Restore conference in October 2017 – I can’t believe it’s been over a year.  I’ve been wanting to reach out and let you know that what you do is amazing.  Restore was really a turning point for me…it helped me find my voice again and begin taking control of my life.  

I wish I could say that I came home from Restore and Jake came home from Every Man’s Battle and we’ve been working on our marriage ever since, but that’s just not my story.  Our divorce was final in July after his affair continued for a year and a half from the time I found out.  I bought a home last spring and the kids and I have settled into our own routine.  We continue to do things together as a family for special events and I can say, if there’s a silver lining, it’s that he’s a more present dad now when he’s with them.  But silver linings are actually the real reason for my note to you today…

When I was at Restore I had the strangest emotional reaction…I was jealous of most of the other women.  It seemed like most of the husbands came back from EMB and wanted to work on things – that there was some level of remorse or regret they’d expressed – but I didn’t have any of that.  Of course he was telling me he was willing to work it out, but there was no action, no sincere apologies, no change.  It wasn’t until I went to Restore that my eyes were finally opened to that.

Since then I have truly learned the power of prayer.  I can’t tell you the number of times I desperately needed something and prayed about it and my prayer was answered almost immediately…as if God was right there holding my hand.  Of course the ultimate prayer I prayed – for my marriage to be saved – didn’t happen, but I know now more than ever that He answers the prayers that need to be answered for my good, and at just the right time.  Despite that prayer I prayed I continued to feel God urging me to leave the marriage.  Shortly after the divorce was final I found out that Jake and his then mistress were expecting a child.  I’m so thankful I was no longer trying to hold on to my marriage when I found that out…it would have been a thousand times more painful.  Instead, I was free to grieve and hand it over to God to help my children with the transition.  I was so incredibly grateful it wasn’t my burden.

Just this past Friday I had something weighing heavily on me – it was a strong urging that I needed to reach out to you to share a little about my story.  On Sunday, the pastor of our church led us in a prayer, not for opportunity, but for boldness.  To reach out to someone who you’ve been thinking of and wanting to share your faith story with and to do it, to share your story.  I knew I was supposed to reach out to you. I’m still not entirely sure why – I’m sure you have women who thank you and share their story with you every day.

I do want you to know that I’m willing to share my story if you ever need someone.  I won’t be the woman who was able to make her marriage work, but I will be the woman who was able to find hope through prayer even in the darkest times of this devastating situation.  I won’t be the woman who felt the benefits so many do after their husbands go to EMB, but I will be the woman who found strength from the Restore conference.  Please let me know if you ever need a written or video testimonial, or even a live guest speaker.  I’d love to share my story and maybe help another woman find peace and hope when things seem hopeless.

Thanks Shelley.

4 thoughts on “Tiffany’s Story

  1. Elizabeth Owen

    February 9, 2019  |  01:14 pm

    Wow. Love this.

    • Shelley Martinkus

      February 9, 2019  |  09:03 pm

      So glad you read this EO! I hope it gives you peace and hope. Grateful for you and your heart. xo – Shelley

  2. Chelle

    February 9, 2019  |  07:34 pm

    How very brave of you to be honest and vulnerable. How mighty our God is , how beautiful the choice you made for you and your children.
    I am better having read this .
    The blessings God has in store for you are beyond measure .
    Keeping you in my prayers

    • Shelley Martinkus

      February 9, 2019  |  09:04 pm

      I love your heart, Chelle. (Everyone needs one of you in their corner!) Thank you for your encouragement to Tiffany! xoxo

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