Reminding Ourselves of Who is in Control
Tuesday, April 16th, 2013
Lately I’ve been struggling with fear and anxiety. I can’t believe that I still find myself in this place. I ask: why can’t I give this to God? Why can’t I trust Him more?
What I’m coming to terms with is in some respects, this is the natural ebb and flow between God and I. I trust. I give Him control. It’s hard work. I become complacent. I then find myself not trusting. Taking control. And at some point, I’ve had enough and turn back to Him. (I’m no different than the Israelites wandering in the desert!)
As I dissect my fears and worries, I realize it usually comes back to control for me. The things I have very little or no control over. I begin to think of worst possible scenarios, which does me no good. And in this season, it’s my pregnancy. In a lot of ways, I feel powerless over the outcome. Sure, I can rest, eat well, de-stress. But I also know that Our Creator is ultimately in charge of this little guy, not me.
Even still, I find myself perseverating over this final month. The labor. The delivery. The first six months with not one, two, but three little boys to take care of (just to be clear, I’m not having triplets… we also have a 2 and 5 year old).
I find myself asking women on a regular basis to replace the lies they hear in their head with the truth. And finally, on Friday, I heard the truth from a friend of mine that my soul longed to hear. And since then, I’ve been playing this truth in my head like a broken record. And its good.
The same God who parted the Red Sea, who gave Sarah and Abraham their own son Isaac, who delivered Joseph from a cistern and from prison…
Is the same God who has given me freedom from an eating disorder and redeemed my marriage.
Therefore, I can choose to trust him with this 3rd little baby boy. I can choose to trust him with this last month of pregnancy, the labor, the delivery, the first six months of his life…
I’m not sure what it may be today that is bringing you anxiety. Your husband’s choices? His integrity? Your future as a couple? As a family? Whatever it may be, I encourage you to try this exercise. Here is a template for you to follow:
Think of what speaks to you from the Bible that God did for those he loved. Remind yourself of these miracles that he performed.
Then think about what God has done in your life. What has he done just for you? What has he redeemed?
Last, after reminding yourself of these truths, tell yourself that you CHOOSE to trust Him, regardless of the outcome, for the specifics that you are struggling with today.